so i took a day off school because of the snow

but tbh that's such a lie
i cba for school
and i feel ill

and plus my dream last night oh my god fvdsnkmdelw;

hey dan |-)

:D

if i posted half of what i was thinking

you'd all think i was such a slut.

you know what fuck the numbers

everyone seems to be getting jiggy
then there's me

l o l

/wrists

seventy-four: so here i go again

all the shit i write is love related
but i have no love life
i would
but no
she's prettier
she's nicer
she's thinner
she's more confident
she's so much more than i am really
LOL cliche i know
what is wrong with me

...

why am i so afraid to lose you when you're not even mine.

i hate snow
last time it snowed it was great
but now it's crap /;
ergh, it's too cold to be single
it's too cold to do anything, really
):
i could ramble on for ages tbh
but i won't

seventy-three : actually

if you do find this
because i know some people have
don't spread it around like everyone did last time
thank you.

seventy-two: lolololol

omg.
old blog has been rediscovered.
xD
i was such a twat oh my :')
i only really came back to rant.
so i'll rant 'cause i know no one will read this.

so, imagine this...
you're in year 10, and you've been friends with these people, 7 people, since year 7.
in year 7, you were the only person from your primary school to go to this new school.
you didn't know anyone except your older brother, and he really didn't want to be associated with you.
but then you met these 7 people,
and you make friends.
they say you're their best friend.
you like that.
but then... things start happening.
they go out on half days, weekends, all together, like best friends.
but they don't invite you.
they have parties.
they don't invite you.
they tell secrets to each other...
and not to you.
you feel unloved.
like no one wants to talk to you.
no one cares.
but they're your friends.
you can't leave them.
this goes on for a year and a bit.
it becomes normal.
you just... get used to it.
but then, a new girl comes.
her eyes are very, very blue.
you two hit it off right away.
and she says you two are best friends.
and for once, it feels like it.
you have fun together.
you go places.
you text all the time.
you save seats for her on the bus,
the two of you are inseparable, joined at the hip almost.
but, like in any relationship, on the 25th of March, the cracks started to show.
boy shaped cracks.
cracks in the shape of a couple of heated arguments.
and those cracks never healed.
you'd have liked them too, after all she was your best best best friend.
but people change, times change, she moved on and so did you.
so, after this girl, you end up going back to the original group of 7.
well... you never really left, there was just someone else.
someone else that's gone by this point.
this is about... year 9, by the way.
and things go pretty much back to normal.
they do their own thing, you tag along.
but then you meet this other girl.
she's popular, she's stunningly pretty, and she is one of the nicest people you have ever talked to in your LIFE.
she's a great listener, and she understands.
it's not long before the two of you talk non-stop.
and she says "best friends for ever."
you don't even know what to say.
you agree, a smile on your face, and you remain best friends.
which is quite a new feeling, tbh.
someone that's always there.
it's nice.
you like it.
but once, you got sick of being left out.
you confronted them.
and they inboxed you back,
from their phones, because they weren't home.
they inboxed you back from a party that you weren't invited too.
you feel... insulted.
but then, you realise that nothing is ever going to change.
they've picked their group and you are not part of it.
you're not cool with it, to be frank, but what else can you do?
everything is normal again, until about the end of year 9, or about there.
the original 7 found another 4.
they're nice people.
they're very VERY nice people.
there's no doubt about that.
but as they get welcomed further in,
you get pushed further out.
those outings?
they're going, you're not.
those parites where they said they were only allowed a certain number, and they said that's why they couldn't invite you, but they would if they could?
they're going, along with the original 7, not you.
those inboxes, the ones full of the secrets that only best friends would know?
they're in them, not you.
the private jokes that you weren't there to understand??
they're making new ones, without you.
you'll be sat that little bit too far out of the circle,
looking and feeling like an outsider.
they'll be talking about their plans,
their parties, their weekends, their holidays,
right in front of you, but are you going?
nope.
you should be used to this, but for some reason, right in the back of your mind, you're not.
you can't figure out why, and then you realise.
the tables have been turned.
it's like your the one that's just joined this group, the foreigner.
it's like they've been there for 3 and a bit years, not you.
them.
but you don't feel malice towards them, oh no.
you feel sadness.
that's the only emotion, really.
sadness.
you're the "silent member".
they said it themselves.
silent member.
you can't put how that feels into words.
that feeling of not being wanted.
but you cope.
you're a fucking fighter, you can cope!
you can cope...


if anyone finds this, i will be in so much shit.

seventy-one: ...

ohai tears,
where did you come from?

seventy: merrr.

oh, people are back on blogger.
now, i leave.

sixty-nine: fuck this.

i'm sick of my parents being divorced.
it's never really got to me before.
and now it has.
fbdnkaml~lxsaxlpws.

i'm sick of being so lonely.
everyone is in a couple now,
always being the 3rd/5th/7th wheel is getting tiring.

this is shit.
just you talking to her makes me want to cry.
facebook wall posts, and now i know you're texting her.
i'm invisible.
i honestly think i'm invisible.

no one invites me anywhere.
ever.
i haven't been out anywhere without family in so long.
makes me think i'm not even fucking wanted, tbh.
daddy, i know you won't take the job in san francisco,
but if you do, i'm coming with you.
no one would miss me if i left.
i know it.
i'm always on my own, no one includes me,
people barely talk to me.
my guild play group only wanted me because i like poetry.
i can't even blag a couple of days off school because this week is too important.
i'm trying.
i really am.
nobody else is.

i'm so, so glad no one reads these...

sixty-eight.

you don't care.
you'll never care.

sixty-seven: long time no speak, blogger.

in one sense, i'm so happy no one comes on here anymore.
blogger is back the way i like it,
unpopular and deserted.
so i can rant.
rant rant rant rant rant :D
so, yeah...

there's something i think i need to announce to... someone/something/anything.
i discovered it recently.
and i don't like it much,
and you haven't realised, i don't think.
but it's one of those things that eats you up inside.
pretty blatantly, it's about you.
you're stupid, you're annoying,
you continue to hurt me, physically and mentally,
and you have no idea.
but i think the thing that pisses me off the most would be the way you can make me smile without even trying,
the way you start every conversation with "hello wanker!"
the way i can be my complete and total self around you,
the way you make me open up to you,
the way you pull out all the stops to make me feel better,
the way you say things that make me feel like the only person in the world that matters,
the way you don't try to be anything you're not.

you make me smile, you make me laugh, you make me happy.
and...
i love you.
there.
i said it.
merrrrrrrrrrrrr.
fml.

thank you, and goodnight, motherfxckersss. ♥

sixty-six: so, i guess this is it.

what have i done to myself?
i come back from an amazing day with my bestest friends.
dump my stuff, grab a cookie,
then managed to catch sight of myself in a mirror.

holy shittttt.

there was this girl, right, stood there, looking back at me.
is that actually me?
because i... i don't like it.
i hate it.
it's nothing to do with my facial features ect.
but... i don't know.
i tried so hard to change myself and ended up with...
that?
feeling a bit like mulan, atm.
or hercules in the first half of the movie.

i will find my way, i can go the distance,
i'll be there someday, if i can be strong,
i know ev'ry mile, will be worth my while,
i would go most anywhere,
to feel like i belong...
^ yeah, i'm feeling a lot like that.

who is that girl i see, staring straight, back at me?
why is my reflection someone i don't know?
^ or like that...

they're my lyrics, up there.
old disney movies = ♥
i'm watching hercules right now [:

so adios, motherfuckerrrs. ♥

sixty-five: fun with google, moans & an apology.

it feels like i haven't blogged in aaaaaaaaaages.
sorry, i think.
there's so much i could write,
but i don't, 'cause...
well, actually, i don't have a reason.
i just don't like sharing anymore /:
but apparently i have to try and "open up" more.
so chances are this is gonna be extra long.
you can stop reading now, if you want.

yeah, i'm weird, and you probably should have gathered that by now.
i am also easily amused.
so i was typing words into google.
...
P:

1) why...
- is the sky blue
- are Michael Jacksons kids white
- did the chicken cross the road
- is the sea salty
- does my eye twitch

2) stop...
- hammertime (LOL)
- smoking

3) who...
- killed archie mitchell
- is the stig
- wants to be a millionaire
- cares about scotland (?)

i'll stop with the google now.
'cause i doubt anyone's still reading.

and another thing...
what's happened to everyone?
nobody's the same anymore.
and i include myself in that.
the people i thought i'd never loose have just... upped and left.
people i thought i knew continue to surprise me,
by what they do, how they speak...
who they are.
i'm continually confused,
i find myself doing things that shock myself,
just to find some sort of thrill.
my life is so average it hurts.

i miss siobhan♥♥♥
doctor who was quite a letdown, tbh.
i never thought i'd say that. D:
i find myself hating people that i shouldn't.
i'm sick of trying to include myself,
if you wanted me there, you'd make a little bit of effort?
i hate not being able to tell anyone things.

our year us built on a bed of lies and secrets.
can no one else see that?
or is it a well known fact,
but the people that could sort it out are too ignorant to care?
i'm not gonna bait out my life anymore,
if no one else cares why should i?

having said my life is boring,
yesterday & last night was amaaaaaazing ♥
thank you chloe kingscote!

oooffff, i doubt anyone will read this,
but have some lyrics anyways.

everybody's changing - keane
"so little time, try to understand that i'm trying to make a move just to stay in the game, i try to stay awake and remember my name but everybody's changing and I don't feel the same..."

in the worlds of noel fielding-
"i have a face, you have a face, everything's gonna be alright."

♥♥♥

sixty-four: he looked out and said to me "run for your life!"

fine, i admit it...
i love doctor who.
it's amazing.
♥ ♥ ♥
even though david tennant's left.
*sob sob* )':
david tennant was actually the best.
the actual meaning of
"The Doctor"
was found in david tennant.




^ ^ ^
chameleon circuit ♥ ♥ ♥
a band whose genre is "time lord rock".
om nom nom nom :3
not only that, but a band with charlie mcdonnell & alex day.
i've actually fallen in love.
aahhhhhhhhhh!
that song's not even their best,
search "blink chameleon circuit" on youtube.
about episode 139, with the weeping angels.
best.
episode.
ever.

matt smith is good, however.
not david tennant, i admit,
but my god,
the man is fit.
and he had a good first epidode :3

my god, i'm such a nerd.

lyrics! xD

an awful lot of running - chameleon circuit
"it's completely terrifying but it's so so exciting,
he said i was brilliant and i could change the world,
so many places i've been; there's so much more to see,
we've got galaxies and planets and moons
and an awful lot of running to do..."

eubanks out, (Y)
♥

sixty-three.

merrrrrrr.
i'm on my ipod & i'm useless at typing on this thing /;
so i guess i'm gonna have to make this a short one.

formspring is reeeeeeaallyyy getting me down.
everyone else has
"you're so pretty!"
"i love you but i don't wanna say anything 'cause you'll laugh at me :$"
"you have beautiful eyes..."
and i get
"slag"
"go hang yourself"
"you deserve to die"
and a ton of random racist abuse.
gee, thanks.
that's really gonna make me feel nice |:
i still don't know who these people are,
or why they hate me so much,
but there must be something about me that just makes me hateable.
can someone tell me what it is?
...
please?

so next time any of you davenant lot ask me what's wrong,
just go and read my formspring.
and there is your reason.

gaaahhh, i'm actually shaking now /;
FML.
forget this.
i need a hug.

sixty-two.

wow,
i'm so inconsiderate.
and i've decided that from now on i'm gonna name my blogs
the number blog they are.
it's so much easier.

today, i cbf to write.
so i'm gonna give you some lyrics.
for almost the rest of this blog...
i'm lazy, ok?

"but whether i'm the rose of sheer perfection,
a freckle on the nose of life's complexion,
the cinderella or the shine apple of its eye,
i gotta fly once, i gotta try once,
only can die once, right, sir?
ooh, life is juicy, juicy and you see,
i gotta have my bite, sir.
get ready for me love, 'cause i'm a "comer"
i simply gotta march, my heart's a drummer,
don't bring around a cloud to rain on my parade."

"how much pain has cracked your soul?
how much love would make you whole?
you're my guiding lightning strike,
i can't find the words to say,
they're overdue,
i'd travel half the world to say,
i belong to you."

now, i have work.
FML.

show's over motherfuckerrrssss. ♥

aha.

so, yeah,
this is basically just a blog to tell all of you to go and see kick-ass.
do it.
and do it now.
best.
movie.
ever.
not much has happened since yesterday, LOL.

i just want to congratulate you.
because people are getting a massive boner over your business,
and if you like her, then you like her,
simple as that.
tbh, it took courage to ask her out when you did,
and people are gonna put you down for that,
and abuse you on formspring, LOL,
but i don't even get why people hate you so much for it,
if you care so much about his life,
why not a) let him live it the way he wants too
and b) let him be happy?
i probably only know a bit of the story,
but from what i can figure out,
people are stupid.
goshh.

so yeah, simone out.
"show's over motherfuckers."

wow.

weeeeeeeeeell...
it feels like i haven't updated in ages D:

OMG, PEOPLE, 60TH BLOG POST.
when did that happen?!
i blog too much (':

aahh, you said my hair looked nice on friday.
i was spazzing out with happiness to demi,
and she goes,
you're putting this in your blog, aren't you?
and apparently the look on my face said,
"well, yeah."
as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
LOL.
i love demi :')

i have, like, nothing left to say.
FML, my life is so boring.
but i'm happy,
and that's all that matters(:

song of my recent events:
stuttering - the friday night boys
"i can never be myself, how can i when i'm stuck in hell?
stutterin', stutterin', stuttereh-ing, stutterin', stutterin', stuttereh-ing..."

♥

fml.

well,
today was the
worst day ever.
and i'm not gonna talk about it... |:

but i want to tell siobhan dooley
that i love her more!♥

well, this was a waste of time.

and maybe it's not my weekend, but it's gonna be my year.

everyone's so nostalgic atm.
i don't really know what to do about that. P:
beacuse i'd so, so prefer not to talk about the past.
you see, the past is a nice place to visit,
but i don't wanna get stuck there!
so, for a change, i'll talk about the present. (:

right now, i'm confused.
i'm scared of the future.
i love siobhan dooley more than anything in the world. ♥
i make mistakes, who doesn't?
and i think they've made me realise when to just back awayyy.
i laugh at everything, and i think i'm going to hell for that :|
i may fail... but i fail excellently.
i call my best friend "boner" and end up shouting about boners to try and get her attention.
^ failing with style, my friend.
don't hate me cause you ain't me ;] xD
this is turning into an about me, LOL.
oh well, i've started now ;]
i cried at the deaf kids on glee.
it was actually so moving.
i need a life.
and as much as i hate it,
this is the present,
even though i've ruined my future by picking art,
and every other option i picked,
that's nice (:
LOL.
as alex would say i'm "quirky".
which is a nice way of saying mentally retarded.
paha, i love alex :')

IT'S LYRICS TIME.
when our time is up, when our lives are done, will we say we've had our fun?
will we make a mark this time? will we always say we tried?
well, will we?

good mood.
gooooooooooood mood.

love love love.

and now i'm told that this is life.

fuuuck me.
today, i realised something.
even though i'd kinda changed,
i have the same mindset.

and i think i'm gonna have to change that.

life's too short to wake up in the morning with regrets, right?
and i regret not talking to you when i have chances,
but i'm scared.
and i really don't wanna be.
because we get on.
well...
we should get on.
we could get on.
we will get on.
but i need...
something.
and that's something to make me stand out.
from everything, right?
there's no point following the crowd anymore,
cause any further in and i might get lost in it.
but once again...
i'm scared.
this is a world where i can be anything,
so why am i afraid to be me?
i shouldn't be.
and... i'll regret this,
but i promise myself,
i won't be.
...
i won't be.

"everything's gonna kill you sooner or later, so why not die from the things that make you happy?"
so what if my brother was talking about sleep, COD and food,
he's right, isn't he?

right, after all that,
let's start again, shall we?

hi, i'm simone.
nice to meet you.
♥

my day?

just one more day and this week will be over.
all i've done is be pissed and embarrass myself.
yes, in front of you. |:
i'm never eating bread again. |:
i'm gonna regret saying that, LOL.
i'm tired.
this week has been long.
but your smile makes my week.

you're amazing ♥

time for bed, me thinks?

listen to accidentally in love - counting crows.
i love that song.

simone says yawwwnnnn.
naaiigghttt.

today.

well, this has been the
worst day ever.

i have an entire bag of frozen peas on my shoulder,
it hurts that much.
thanks for hitting me, conor.
i hate you.
urrggghh, fml 1.

i'm hungry, and i don't even know why?
oh wait, yes i do.
i got a bread roll for lunch.
thanks miss van loo.
gaahh, fml 2.

you smiled at me in the corridor ♥
but it was barely 10 seconds.
you made my day, and you don't even know it.
fml 3.

3 strikes and i'm out.
one little note...

please stop staring at me.
yes, i have noticed.
no, you can't turn your head fast enough.
yes, it does piss me off.

and now the formspring abuse is starting.
oh for goodness sake.
kill me now, please.
:'/

♥

♥?

happy simone.
happy happy happy.
you talked to me again today.
and i was babbling like a fish.
and you knew.
and i know you realised.
and you smiled.
all you did was smile.
all i could think was
god, you have a gorgeous smile.
and i'm sure that at one point you laughed...
but that really doesn't matter to me.
and you asked if i was feeling better after yesterday.
i wasn't,
but as soon as you said "hi" my mood... lifted.
you know i exist.
and not only that,
you care.
that's right, i am officially crazy about you.
and i can now safely say,
you had me at hello.
♥

stupid.

this is crazy.
i barely even know you
and yet...
all i can think about is
you?
this isn't right.
this is being retarded.
this is actually possibly the most stupid thing i've ever done.
well... one.
this is me,
that is you.
and i have to get over myself
but this is insufferable.
and you're another guy that barely knows i exist.
and this will keep going on,
because i'm a stupid little girl.

they hello, they say hola and they say bonjour.

i think i've ruined the rest of my life.
and i'm not panicky about that somehow.
i probably should have taken music.
or geography. or history.
or full course re.
i know i've made a terrible mistake,
but i'm not really worried about that.

i really need to get a grip, LOL. ^^'

it's mothers day and my mothers gone out.
ohai, dysfunctional family.

recently, i've been... unlike myself.
and i like this "new me".
i'm different.
i don't live in hoodies and skinny jeans anymore.
i know, i know. i'm shocked too.
i love the way it's bright when i wake up in the morning, too.
IT'S GETTING WARMER! FUCK YES. i don't do cold, you see.
i've been spending about an hour of everyday just pissing myself with laughter.
and i have a but of an obsession with Hadouken! atm.
i bust out in living room raves with my older brother, which make my day.

all in all,
i miss talking to you,
but i have so many things that make this worthwhile. :]

i have rehearsals now, GAAAAHHHH. D;
i actually cbf.
oh well,
life goes on ;]

song of my... well... idk, when i last updated:
accidentally in love - counting crows
"how much longer will it take to cure this,
just to cure it cause i can't ignore it if it's love..."

♥

unexpected.

maybe this is just another one of those times
where you get caught completely off guard
and someone does something
really tiny
that makes you feel like the only person in the world that matters.

maybe this is one of those times
where you only really realise
how much something meant to you
when jealously rears it's ugly head.

maybe this is one of those times
where you spend ages
just lying to yourself.


or maybe it's not.
maybe it's one of those times where you can't help yourself
but you feel a way shouldn't.

maybe it's not.
but maybe it's something more.

♥

(:

i really really wanna be with you
like i was before
this distance between us
makes me want you more
i do mean
you are the cutest boy i've ever seen
and you've got that something
something that i want,
something that i need,
a dirty little young girls dream.
♥

gah?

it's called a dignified silence.
slag me off all you want,
whatever makes you feel better.
believe lies,
sure.
start calling me a backstabbing bitch,
why not?
i'm not gonna regret any of this.
even though you have no reason to hate me,
and everyone thought you were a slut anyway.
but that's cool.
have a nice life (Y)

you got the love.

time after time i think "oh lord what's the use?"
time after time i think it's just no good.
sooner or later in life, the things you love you loose,
but you got the love
i
need
to see me
through.

guess.

"and nobody,
in all of oz,
no wizard that there is or was,
is ever gonna bring.
me.
down."

three makes it a crowd.

that's just how i do it, isn't it.
i always manage to screw things up for myself.

i need to stop talking to you, thinking about the other you and even remember that i know the third you.

and plus, i'm so fucking lonely.
so that's so not helping.

and i can safely say this all started in french this week.

there's no point baiting out my life, because i know that i'll regret it.
then again, i regret everything i seem to do.

i'm so not in the mood to write anymore.
:'(

... :/

i'm still in a good mood.
...
kinda.

i had a terrible day.
enterprise day, wtf?
complete and utter crap, tbh.
gaaahhh, go and die whoever came up with that.
another thing...
you're such a player. i hate you.
...
omg, simone's writing about another guy?!
yeah. haha.
i hate you.
stop hugging me.
please.

and then there's you.
not the usual "you".

you need to get a grip.
i can't believe i ever stood up for you. :|
it was a happy relationship, you don't go and break it up?
nobody cares you're "in love" with her.
because you don't know what love is.
no teenage boy does.
well... maybe with the exception of james hardy.
and you're gonna be like "neither do you, simone, shut uuuuup."
well... actually.
i think i do.
think.
i think love is... doing anything to make that one person happy.
betraying your best friends (twice, in my case) just to be happy with them.
blowing off your family to laze about and do nothing with them.
feeling empty and alone when you're not with them.
only doing what you think's the best for them, never mind how you feel.
never being able to keep them from your mind, regardless of how hard you try.
finding yourself absent mindedly staring at them.
listening to sad songs and relating them back to that one person.
lying to yourself and everyone else that you'll be fine without them.
right?
and you're just obsessed.
you've been waiting for this for so long.
and that... that's just sick.
she was happy.
and if you really loved her you would have let her go.
not because you had no hope...
because you knew that he was good for her.
and that's all that mattered.
that she was happy.
and you don't fall out of love quickly, that much i know.
because if you get in too deep, that's it.
you're stuck.
but you won't get there for years yet.
because you're 14.
you're stupid.
and i want to stab you.

i know you read this.
i hope you read this.
and i hope you come to your senses.
let her go, dude. just let her go.

song of my day (that really isn't gonna help this situation):
mr right - a rocket to the moon
"it's true, he never made it through a day of school, the only thing he studied was you..."

♥

gives you hell.

oh my.
i'm in such a good mood.

shock horror!
and i know this is gonna be so short lived, but oh my goodness,

i'm so fucking happy atm!

i've been making chocolate cake in a mug.
IT'S AMAZING.
i've been listening to 'gives you hell' on repeat.
i love it.
aaahhhh. :D

i can't even explain it.
i'm just...
happy.
SCORE.
dear happiness, how i've missed you!

i think i've got it,
i'm fed up of wishing.
and tbh, why should i be bothered?
it doesn't mean much to you, obvssss.
(:
^ have a smiley face.
simone isn't feeling very scornful.
simone is happy.
simone would like to spread the happiness.
and plus, tomorrow, i'm gonna get "wasted" on energy drinks and cookies (with extra added taurine) with my best friend, siobhan.
we'll be hungover by 9am, bitches.
it's sainsburys fault,
why would they make a litre of it 98p?
it's like they want us to drink it before 12am!
and we don't even have any lessons tomorrow.
SCORE!
xD

i'm gonna go now, (:
goodbye world(:

song of my day:
gives you hell - the all american rejects
now where's your picket fence, love, and where's that shiny car?

¬¬

this is gonna be short,
and not even a proper post,
cause i'm going out in a minute.

just one quick thing...

stop copying me!

you're not being cool,
you're just really annoying me.

get your own taste in music,
get your own things to find and post to your best friends wall,
get your own little phrases to say,
get your own ideas,
get your own life.

pisstake, tbh.

fucking pisstake.



i'll update again, hopefully happier...

i can see your halo.

i'm blogging because i can for this post.
so it will be full of crap.

but then again, i'm always full of crap.

so, how's simone been lately?

pretty shit.
but that's ok :')

no, it's not.
but i can lie to myself.
...
no, i can't.
who am i kidding.

i miss my best friend.
again.
things that've gone on lately reminded me of the private jokes and all the fun we managed to have.
for once, i'm not afraid to admit that.
yeah, i miss you.
just not in the way everyone seems to think i do, ok?
i don't know why she wrote all that shit.
she probably thought she was helping.
she wasn't...
oh well.
life goes on...

i don't have a song,
i have a quote.
it's from a song, but oh well.
you'll always be my thunder.


actually, i do have a song.
back to the start - lily allen
i don't know why i felt the need to keep it up for oh so long, it's all my fault, i'm sorry, you did absolutely nothing wrong...




bronte is gonna kill me...

:'(

EFF.
EM.
ELL.

that's right, people.
fuck my life.

i don't even know why i'm writing this shit.

i was sobbing my eyes out yesterday,
i could barely eat, then almost ate myself silly.
and you didn't even remember.

i haven't been sleeping well, at all.
i was SO ill because of lack of sleep.
i was crying and dry retching into a bin.
then into the toilets.
i was shaking.
actually shaking.
i was so cold,
then boiling hot.
i got a hug of mr midgley he felt so sorry for me.
mr midgley.

and you didn't even remember.

well... you probably did.
and that fact you didn't care is what kills me.
or did you?
ahh, there goes that hope again...

i just ate an entire pizza, and now i feel sick.

fuck you, fate.
fuck you, supreme being.
fuck. my. life.

song of my day?
i don't even know anymore.

...

i'm not really in the mood to write much.
i broke my lent.
i've almost eaten myself into a coma.
some people just bring out the worst in me...
it's raining.
i've been reduced to watching the simpsons in the faint hope it might make me laugh.

it's not working.

i don't have a song.
sorry.

:(

greaaaaat.

GET. LIVES.

he's done nothing, ok?
FACE IT.
you, of all people, have nothing to be pissed at him for?

people have feelings.
and maybe he has ones that he doesn't want? i'm sure i do, yet you're so... disgusting to him? oh my jesus, i actually want to punch you round the face sometimes?

yeah, he got close to her on focus day.
you're acting like a lost puppy.
yeah, i'm sure she liked you once, but obviously not anymore?
i know how it feels, so don't call me a hypocrite.
but i'm making a fucking effort to move on.
i've given up mayday parade and secondhand serenade for lent.
i've stopped writing my poems.
i'm attempting being happy?

and because you can't seem to do that, you want to make his life a misery?
him, whose done nothing but have feelings, and then try and suppress them?
he seems to be one of the strongest people i know right now.
take a look at it from his point of view?
walk a mile in his shoes.
for me?
the girl that's always on your side.

yeah, i know how both of you feel.
and you're pretty much being a penis about it.
i know,
you're supposed to be my best friend.
but i know what's right, and i'm gonna stay with what i believe is right.
and if that's his side, so be it.
if i loose a best friend...
so be it.
you say you're standing up for a best friend,
and now, so am i.

¬ ¬

gaaahh, sorry for the angriness today.
been feeling so out of it lately.
*sad face*

siobhan dooley, you're my best friend, and even though microsoft word gives you squiggly red lines under your name i think it's perfect(: i don't know what i'd do without you. i'm proud to call you my bestest friend, ok?
nobody hurts you and gets away with it.
i'll kill him.
actually kill him.
and only for you baby,
only for you ♥

one last thing,
2 days.
anniversary of the best day of my life.
never thought it wouldn't be happy, though...
:'(

i need to stop before i bait my life out?

song of my day:
maybe this time - kristen chenowith
maybe this time i'll be lucky, maybe this time he'll stay...

♥

'broken hearts are bad, but the alternative is much worse.'

dear cyberspace,

what am i really on about?

i speak so much shit it's not even funny anymore?

the past keeps coming up to hit me. over and over again.

what happened to live and let die
what happened to the past being over?
what happened to... forgetting?

i can't do it though, can i?
"but we both know that i'm not that strong..."
right?

... right?
:(

ignore what i say, just listen to the music i tell you too.


song of my day:
into your arms - the maine
i'm falling in love but it's falling apart, i need to find my way back to the start, when we were in love things were better than they are, let me back into,
into your arms...

♥

whe-eee-eee-eee-eeere...

is love?

another question that simone often asks herself.

well, can anyone tell me?

...
no?

no one
ever
can.

and that's a fact i guess i'll have to get used too, right?
that's another sad truth, right?
that is the truth... right?
feck it.
you said no to forever,
but i would gladly spend eternity by your side.
i would.
i really would.

i hate my brain.
it keeps these little bubbles of hope.
and i'll be getting on with life,
and then a bubble will pop.
and i'll think of you.

"hope: the general feeling that some desire will be fulfilled"

yeah, i've got hope.
i don't want it.
but i've got hope.
i know that i should have no hope.
but for some strange reason,
i have hope.

hope, hope, go away,
come again another day...
or in another situation or something.
anything.

song of my moment:
one last kiss - madina lake
"shivering as the truth is settling, her tomorrow has nothing to do with me..."

♥

countdown.

just one more day.
24 hours.
1440 minutes.
86 400 seconds.

and then i get to see you again ♥

and that makes a happyecstatic simone.

:D

hmmm.

i feel like blogging again today.
i also feel like curling up in a ball and crying.
why?
because i'm that lonely.

i need a hug.
worlds longest hug, me thinks?
and then i want someone to kiss me on the forehead.
or pat me on the head and say
you did good, kid.

oh simone, all you do is take take take.

i know,
i'm a shit person, sometimes?
all i do is want want want.
all you did was give.
and give.
and give.
you never asked for anything back.
i massively took you for granted and all i want is a hug from you.
just one more...

now simone, you're being stupid.

i know, because one hug and i won't let go.
one hug and i'll remember.
one hug and... and i'll miss you more.

i'll miss your hands in mine,
i'll miss walking aimlessly to nowhere,
i'll miss your smell,
i'll miss everything that made you... you.
because everything about you was perfection to me.

i've already given you a song,
i really don't want to find one that defines my mood.

♥

could it be that we have been this way before?

this is gonna sound like a rant, and for those poor souls that have chosen to read this, i apologise.

i seem to be the only lonely person this side of japan?

everybody seems to have someone, someone to focus their time and energy onto.
be that a good thing or a bad, at least it's someone?

i don't think i've ever managed to ever feel this lonely.

valentines day was 3 days ago, and i was so depressed it wasn't even funny. everyone on the street seemed to have someone to give them roses, or hold their hand.
is that really too much to ask?

some people are spoilt for choice, they have tons of people chasing after them, some decide to be unfaithful to their partners, and it's like,
"errrmmmm... share please?!"

you've got the single people, but the one's that have their eye on someone. the ones with hope. the ones that can still dream.

you've got the ones in happy relationships.
'nuff said.

and then you've got what seems like... me?
single, and... unfocused?

i know, i moan faaaaaaaaaar too much, but is that really fair?
i know what you're thinking...
"life isn't fair."
you think i haven't figured that out yet?
gaaahhh,
i just wanna rip someones head off?
D:

wait...
i just turned on my phone and got a random text saying nothing but
"abortion".
i haven't laughed that much in so long :')
oh my god, LOL!
you know who you are,
thank you xD

well, hello bipolar simone.

i think i should stop before i spill out my life. :|

i need a hug you.

song of recently:
fall for you - secondhand serenade
"tonight will be the night that i will fall for you over again, don't make me change my mind...

♥

... well.

it's valentines day.

and it has been for about 5 minutes. :|
only 23 hours and 55 minutes left to go...

i hate valentines.
mainly because i'm single.
single. single. single.
worst word ever, me thinks?
i hate single life anyway, but then you've got today, valentines, to make the lonely feel lonelier.

cupid, we need to have a chat about your aim...
which basically means get some.
please.
i hate valentines so, so much.
and i need a hug :(
i'm gonna be really depressed all day now.
i get to watch couples be happily in love, while i sit and... eat myself into a coma? cry myself dry?
fun. fun. fun.

to all those people snogging in the street, get a room? i'm sure there are some going cheap.

anyways, i guess you could say i'm tired.
and i am.
it's valentines day.
*yaaaayy...*

song of recently:
so far away - mayday parade
"she finds hope in the strangest places, she reads her books and she knows the faces of everyone whose ever said she's alone..."

peaceout'

i don't even know what to say anymore.

i had the night of my life last night.

"i would do alex gaskarth, and by the sounds of it, he'd do anything that moves. score!"

i got elbowed in the face.
sat on in a mosh pit.
crowd surfed.
and cried.
and not from the pain.
well,
i had my own, as well as other peoples blood on my face.
i was covered in water,
as well as beer and other peoples sweat & piss.
and i was sat in seating, after someone fractured their foot and i managed to split my lip, with tears streaming down my face.
it started,
i saw you.
oblivious.
having the night of your life.
and so they sang.
and so i cried.
and so everyone around me jumped and sang.
oblivious.
i waited until it was over,
and wiped the blood off my face.
stood up,
and fucking sang my voice out.

still covered in sweat.
still covered in piss.
still covered in beer.
but alive.
so mother-fucking alive.

you haven't lived until you've done that.

i'm speechless.
goddamn speechless.

btw, remembering sunday is the most beautiful song ever when played live.

just alex gaskarth,
a chair,
a guitar,
and a microphone stand.
fuck yes?

the blackout were insane.
i remember the scared looks on some little girls faces as we screamed
"WE ARE THE CHILDREN OF THE NIGHT.
WE ARE THE CHILDREN."
at sean smith.
aaahhh, sean smith <3
SEXYYYY welshman. xD





i would.
you know you would.

i will leave with the pictures of those two stunning men.
jizz.

song of my day:
break your little heart - all time low
"you were fake, i was great, nothing personal..."

when i break your little heart in two.

ALL TIME LOW IN 1 DAY.
1 DAY.
i haven't been this excited in so long :D
but if i collapse,
i'm sorry.
there are reasons that i'm not in the mood to talk about.
eeevvvveeerrrrrrr.
i'm meant to be doing drama work right now.
LMAO.
i never do homework.
it's really bad.
i should probably start.
but it's not due in for a week yet...
yeah, i'll do that later xD

idk why, but i've been in these moods.
no warning,
the water works start D:
in re, today, i sat there tears falling from my eyes,
and i actually didn't know why.
mr midgely (coolest re teacher ever)asked me if i was ok.
i didn't even realise i was crying.
people from tables ages away were asking me questions,
arrrghhh, i don't know why?
and then not knowing why makes me cry harder.

i'm a happy child really, honest.

you probably think i'm lying to you.
i'm not. xD
at the bus stop i was crying with laughter at alice.
and i've actually been really happy lately (:
i don't even know why,
lmao, opposite much? ^
xD
i don't seem to know much,
but i dont care :D

my brother found out that i had a blog.
he goes,
"what opinions have you got to offer the internet?"
oh, brother dearest, you are so small minded sometimes :')
that's the exact point.
i have nothing to offer the internet.
well, except what seems to be the story of my life ;]
sometimes you need the world from a teenage point of view, ayy?
that's what i have to offer.
a teenage point of view. (:
i said that to him and he looked at me like i was crazy.
i laughed.
i laughed a lot.

i love the way the sky gets brighter earlier.
i love the way everything seems to be happy.
i love the way everyone's nice to each other for a change.
i love the way i can laugh at anything.
i love the way i'm starting to smile again (:

ahaa, spring makes me happy :D
and after all this time,
the sun is shining again.
i've seen the light at the end of the tunnel.
i'm happy,
and nobody is gonna ruin that for me (:

the sun will come out tomorrow, :D

biarrchh,
i'm simone eubanks.
get fucking used to it ;]

song of my day-
where we belong - lostprophets
"i'll take these storms away, start a brand new story, i'll make it through each day, singing death or glory, lord won't answer me, i won't let it bring me down..."

♥

-.-

she's my best friend.
my bloody best friend.
don't break her heart.
i'll break your face.
not with my fists,
plank of wood, maybe?
fucking baseball bat, me thinks?
sorry,
aaahhhh.
i hate him, sometimes.
but i know he reads this,
so simone must shush now.

brighter note.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY TOMORROW.
cake, nom ^.^
went to the cinema with some of my best friends (:
but it didn't really feel like a birthday,
you weren't there, you see. :(
and i thought i'd be ok,
you said i would be.
but i'm not.
and i know that you know that i'm not.
i'm not even gonna try and deny it anymore.
because i'm not fine.
you know i'm not fine,
and to be dead honest,
i can't remember the last time i was "fine".

oh my, i just read that and realised how depressing i am.
goddammnn.
quite sad.
i really, really miss you.
because i could safely call you my everything...
aahhh, i'm doing it again.
"CHEER UP, CHICKEN!"
well, that's what rhianne would say (:
and IT'S MY BIRTHDAY TOMORROW :D
i should stop saying that, because i go down the same route ^

OMG.
i got an AMAZINGGG chanel bracelet.
AS A PRESENT!
i'm obsessed with it, LMAO.
IT HAS A BUS CHARM ON IT.
wowowowowow (:
tbh, all my presents were aamazingggggggg :D
i have the best set of friends ♥
no negotiation.

song of my day:
breakin' - the all american rejects
"for so long, i've had to bite my tongue but what's the point if the feeling's gone..."

♥

aaaaah.

"aaaaaaah."
all day, i've wanted to scream at the top of my lungs, just get it out of my system. why?
i don't know.
because.
i use the "because" as my excuse for everything.
why?
because.

GODDAMN.
doing it again :|
it's sad.

but i'm ok.
i'm always ok.

LMAO, i'm such a depressing child.
force of habit.

i need to go to bed now.

NAIIIGHHTTT CYBERSPACE.

woah, i'm hyper.

well.

i need to stop complaining.
i guess it's just become force of habit.
huh.
for the first time in a very long time, i'm speechless.
i can actually remember the last time i was speechless.
people were shaking me, asking me if i was ok,
and all i could do was open and close my mouth like a fish.
i couldn't even feel the tears, i just remember people telling me i was crying.
bad times.
:|
enough of that, me thinks.
i might cry again :')

it's quite sad that i just got proper happy from watching phineas and ferb.
quite jokes, actually.
LMFAO. :|
i have such a sad life.

i dont know why, but i suddenly feel like crying.
huh.
i hate these frigging mood swings :|
aaaahhh.

song of my day:
when i grow up - mayday parade ♥
"but i ain't complaining, we all wanna be famous..."

♥

¬¬

i'm ill.
or at least that's what my mum thinks.
to be dead honest,
i just couldn't face school today.
i have really bad lessons,
i don't have anyone to talk to anymore.
because apparently i'm amazingly self-absorbed and i have no interest for anyone but myself. even though i'm the one that sticks up for you, every frigging day when people badmouth you. even though i basically deserted the rest of my friends so you wouldn't be alone. and how do you repay me? by being closer with another one of my "best friends" and completely forgetting i exist.
you're gonna have a go at me for that^
and bring up the past.
tbh, i don't know what i've done.
i'm not in the wrong here.
and i'm not gonna say it hurts, and that i can't live without you.
i can.
it would just be harder.
much, much harder.
and that goes for both of you.
accuse me of what you want,
but i know that you know that when i'm not wrong,
i don't apologise.
don't have a go at me for no reason,
or i get pissed off,
for no reason.
you get me?
because you should.

^ that man once said:
"that's funny, 'cause i thought i was rubber and you were glue. boing fwip."
so those are my last words.
"boing fwip".

well, it's only payback for what you wrote, love.
don't be a hypocrite.

other than that,
i'm far too 'ill' to care.
i'm far too 'ill' to be typing.
i'm far too 'ill'.

*sigh.*

jesus.

simone eubanks,
you are so, so very stupid.
new years resolution:
stay away from love!
simonem you are the ultimate single girl. stay that way, you fool! steer clear from any fluffy feelings, any warm fuzzy feelings, IGNORE THE HEART, SIMONE. it doesn't know what's best. look at the situation it got you into last time, we don't wanna go there again.

well, that's broken. but i've finally found someone.

i think.

he's nice, he's really good looking, he's not racist and i don't know why i didn't see him before. i've known you for ages, but it only really takes a second, doesn't it? for you to think
"oh my goodness... hello there ;]"

new new years resolution:
stop with the blasphemy.

another thing,
stop stalking me :|
i know she dumped you, but holy shizzle! i'm avoiding you for a reason :|
YOU DON'T TEXT A PERSON SOMETHING LIKE THAT!
it's creepy.
it's weird.
stop it.

this is a short update,
i know better than to bait my life out on here.

song of my day:
the great escape - boys like girls
"watch it burn, let it die, 'cause we are finally free tonight..."

love<3

*sigh*

to be dead honest, cyberspace, i don't even know what to say anymore. trying to be positive kinda failed. and now i can't even type half of what i want to type, because i know that people i know are gonna read it. my blog used to be a place where i could type out... everything, and no one knew, no one cared.
that's the way i liked it.
but then again,
while i was busy pouring out my heart and soul, people who were meant to be my friends had found my blog and were reading it, and spreading it around.
taking the piss out of everything that meant anything to me.
they all seem to think i'm some type of slag.
gee, thanks.

i also learnt that apparently, playing cod is basically a religion.
does no one else see how wildly unattractive that is?!
in french, one guy calls across the classroom "GRENADE!" and almost all other males in the room proceeded to either duck or try and snipe the guy that "threw the grenade".
it's disgraceful. actually disgraceful. i've played it, it's not that amazing.
check that, it's complete and utter shit.
someone's gonna read this and be like
"oh, it's cause you're a girl, you wouldn't understand."
could you shut the fuck up please?
that's like me punching you in the balls, and saying it was fun.
but you wouldn't understand the fun of it, would you?
exactly.
don't be sexist, you massive wankstain.
and that goes for any male that thinks i don't appreciate cod because i'm a girl.
no, actually. it's because it's highly overrated, you sexist wankstain.
atm, i actually hate boys.
they're crude, annoying, judgemental and immature.
4 things i hate.
hate.
i sound like a right moany shit, i know. but i had a sleepover last night.
yeah, it was amaaazing, but a chat made me realise 2 things.
1) who the hell are you?
2) boys aren't worth it.
maybe they should phone in a couple of years when they grow some balls, instead of sticking virtual ones in other virtual peoples mouths. yeah, i went there. how do any of you expect to have a proper relationship when you only talk/text to them when your re-spawning?
it's really, really sad, guys.

-calm down, simone, it's only virtual reality...-

song of my day:
alfie - lily allen
"now how the hell do you ever expect that you'll get laid, when all you do is staying your computer games..."
PREACH, LILY, PREACH.

<3

good morning vietnam!

and it actually is good morning vietnam because over there its 2:00.
so it could be goodnight, but still.

i'd like to say i've cheered up since last post. not really.
i sound like a proper depressing child.
LOL.
but it's all good, really.
well, it's not.
but tbh, i'm trying to put it all behind me.
kinda.
LMFAO. that was a total waste of time :|

i haven't updated in a while, mainly because my finger are usually so cold that i can't even move them, let alone type. i think summer should come soon. and by soon, i mean now. i don't do cold, and i hate snowball fights.

and just another little rant into cyberspace (:
STOP MAKING THE LONELY FEEL LONELIER.
i don't think i need to say more. anyone that knows me well knows that once i get started on a subject like that, i don't stop for ages.
and i start using examples. that's not good for anyone.
wait, i'm started now.
brace yourself, internet...
please stop moaning. i hate the way you try and be her. it's so messed up. you're not her. i don't know why this pisses me off so much, but why are you trying to be such a slag?
it's not a good look on you.
rant over :')

thank you for listening, cyberspace.

and for now, i'm still looking for a chivalric guy who looks plain goddamn amazing, invites me in his house to play on websites for kids and watch movies that make me cry, hold my hand, kisses my forehead and tells me i'm beautiful.
yeah, i know, i'm delusional.
as if anyone like that actually exists :')

quote of my day:
"it's not my problem if you think i'm weird."
- sid vicious.

love<3

urrghh. (world, i wouldn't read this one.)

people.

"urrghh."

from so insanely happy to so insanely not.

im cold and unhappy. that's such a bad mix. i don't know why i'm cold, maybe it's one of those things where you're... not in a state to feel warm. wait, what am i on about? i don't even know. i'm not in a state to do anything right now.

why?

here comes my favourite little miss sunshine quote:
"i hate everything."

i'm not usually this negative. or this pessimistic. i don't know what's got into me. well, i do.
you.
you fail to talk to me ot pick up your goddamn phone when i need you, when i'm having a really bad day all you do is MOAN about your "almost lover" and if i try and talk about why i'm upset, you give me useless advice that you should probably follow yourself.
go get a life, fool.

the people i call my friends are some of the most annoying, self-centred people i've ever had the misfortune to meet. it's cold. i don't do cold. as well as a lot more crap that i so cbf to explain.

and i had a good day as well. thanks for ruining it, fate. (Y)

i'm just kinda curious as to what i've done to piss off some sort of god.



that rubber is everything, and damn, it's catching up.

i really need a hug right now. :|

song of my day:
brick by boring brick - paramore
"well go get your shovel, and we'll dig a deep hole to bury the castle, bury the castle..."

<3

five day weekend.

bonjour, mon ami.

as you may have gathered from the title, i'm having a five day weekend.
OH YES, THANK YOU ODIN. ^-^.
two things i would like to point out about that last sentence.

1) odin is a private joke between me and my older brother. we usually don't talk, let alone joke, but since he can't be bothered to leave the house and i go and get him food, we've been talking a lot more. and my older brother and i prayed to odin for a five day weekend. the five day weekend came, hence the 'thank you odin.'
no, im not pagan.

2) i had a very in depth conversation about '^-^' with a best friend i got back yesterday :D i hate goodbyes and loosing people, so that made me a very happy bunny.
.7.
^ all i'm gonna say (:

i've decided that it is a new year, new me. i know, i sound MASSIVELY like a shitty weight loss advert, but i've decided it's kinda working for me. people i thought were my friends aren't really worth my time or trouble. i've had like... a complete detox of everything that made my life... worse than it should be.



i think that picture up there really sums up my mood.

sorry for all the '...' , i've been told it makes me seem hostile. force of habit, really.

song of my day:
ain't no rest for the wicked - cage the elephant
"oh, there ain't no rest for the wicked, until we close our eyes for good...

love.<3

snow.

people of this fucked up world of ours,
i hate snow.
not all the time, only when some stupid fuckface gets snow on my internet router.
and when i go out to get pizza, and have to phone my brother to come and rescue me. yes, rescue me. for those that don't know me, im short, and converse aren't the best shoes to wear in the snow. my feet were cold, my fingers were colder, and my amazing 6'4 older brother had vans. i love him sometimes (LL). so i have a snow day, i have a towel round my shoulders and i'm watching house with the older brother. we've had to turn the tv up so, so very loud to drown out retards outside chucking snow at each other.
it's not that much fun, jeez...
you may not have noticed, but for me, the novelty of snow has completely worn off.

in other news...
i hate it when you think you know someone. someone that's supposed to be your best friend. someone that tells someone they've known for less than a year a massive lie, because they heard a rumour. such a pisstake. it's like i want to shout at you at the top of my lungs "i thought we were friends?" you don't do that to people! if it's the truth, that's one thing, but a lie? that's a totally different story. and then, possibly the worst thing? when you make up crap to make yourself look better.
jeeeeeeeeez.

i have to stop saying "jeez".

song of my day:
top of the world - all american rejects
"finding a day, don’t wanna be you, when the top of the world falls on you..."

love<3

just to say...

avid followers,
if there are any of you.

2nd blog post of 2010. this isn't a very good year for me, is it? i don't know why but everyone's different now. their new years resolutions have changed them from the people i once thought i knew. but then again, that's basically 2009, but with a different label.
huh.
you're probably all thinking "well, haven't you changed, not them?"
that is a very valid point, my friend.
but if you're not my friend, why the hell are you reading this?

but this time, im determined that things will change. because tbh, with you, douchebag doesn't even cover it. and i've had enough of racist douchebags in 2 weeks to last me a very long time. to be dead honest with whoever reads this thing, i'm a retard, aren't i? i always get my hopes up too far for (no offence intended) a dick, then i always seem surprised when they get bloody broken. why? i don't know. i'm not as smart as everyone seems to think i am. if you bother to read the rest of the blog post, you'll be able to see that. if i was smart, i would have stopped myself before i got in too deep, wouldn't i? i should have done my bloody research and asked people about you before i ended up doing something i might regret. but i didn't. for once, i acted before thinking of the consequences. i don't know if i regret that, because... well, i don't know why. "because" seems to be my rational answer for everything these days.
god, i sound old.
but still, i never thought i would ever sink this low, but i'm having to go to Take That for this quote. not proud.

"cause i need time,
my heart is numb, has no feeling,
so while I'm still healing,
just try and have a little patience...."

(no, i don't listen to Take That, my mum sings that song. all the time.)

for once, all i ask of you is to have a little patience. sure, i know i piss you off, but bloody hell, im mixed up, so i have no clue how to explain this. i don't know what you expect of me, but you obviously found this easier than i did.
i don't wanna be mean.
i don't wanna piss you off.
i just think you should understand, ok?
you were the one person i knew i could trust with everything,
before everything happened,
and i don't want much.
hell, i don't want anything.
not even my friend back.

song of my day:
sink into me - taking back sunday.
"you're all i see, sink into me..."

love.love.love.

2010.

well, here it is.
first blog post of 2010.

in the last 60 seconds on 2009, i remember thinking:
"so this is it."
the end, finally.
the in the first few seconds of 2010, nothing felt different. surrounded by a lot of drunk people hugging... it felt... the same.
no curtain of change had opened to reveal the secrets of the window of life.
5... 4... 3... 2... 1...
new year.
the space of a second.
not exactly a big moment.
huh.

this is the 3rd day of 2010, and my already non-existent love life has pushed itself that little bit further down the shitter.
thanks fate.
last blog post i said i met a guy.
this blog post i'm sad to inform you all he's never going to be mine.
he's my 'best friend's.
oh the joys.

i dont have a song for you.
sorry.

love <3