sixty-six: so, i guess this is it.

what have i done to myself?
i come back from an amazing day with my bestest friends.
dump my stuff, grab a cookie,
then managed to catch sight of myself in a mirror.

holy shittttt.

there was this girl, right, stood there, looking back at me.
is that actually me?
because i... i don't like it.
i hate it.
it's nothing to do with my facial features ect.
but... i don't know.
i tried so hard to change myself and ended up with...
that?
feeling a bit like mulan, atm.
or hercules in the first half of the movie.

i will find my way, i can go the distance,
i'll be there someday, if i can be strong,
i know ev'ry mile, will be worth my while,
i would go most anywhere,
to feel like i belong...
^ yeah, i'm feeling a lot like that.

who is that girl i see, staring straight, back at me?
why is my reflection someone i don't know?
^ or like that...

they're my lyrics, up there.
old disney movies = ♥
i'm watching hercules right now [:

so adios, motherfuckerrrs. ♥

sixty-five: fun with google, moans & an apology.

it feels like i haven't blogged in aaaaaaaaaages.
sorry, i think.
there's so much i could write,
but i don't, 'cause...
well, actually, i don't have a reason.
i just don't like sharing anymore /:
but apparently i have to try and "open up" more.
so chances are this is gonna be extra long.
you can stop reading now, if you want.

yeah, i'm weird, and you probably should have gathered that by now.
i am also easily amused.
so i was typing words into google.
...
P:

1) why...
- is the sky blue
- are Michael Jacksons kids white
- did the chicken cross the road
- is the sea salty
- does my eye twitch

2) stop...
- hammertime (LOL)
- smoking

3) who...
- killed archie mitchell
- is the stig
- wants to be a millionaire
- cares about scotland (?)

i'll stop with the google now.
'cause i doubt anyone's still reading.

and another thing...
what's happened to everyone?
nobody's the same anymore.
and i include myself in that.
the people i thought i'd never loose have just... upped and left.
people i thought i knew continue to surprise me,
by what they do, how they speak...
who they are.
i'm continually confused,
i find myself doing things that shock myself,
just to find some sort of thrill.
my life is so average it hurts.

i miss siobhan♥♥♥
doctor who was quite a letdown, tbh.
i never thought i'd say that. D:
i find myself hating people that i shouldn't.
i'm sick of trying to include myself,
if you wanted me there, you'd make a little bit of effort?
i hate not being able to tell anyone things.

our year us built on a bed of lies and secrets.
can no one else see that?
or is it a well known fact,
but the people that could sort it out are too ignorant to care?
i'm not gonna bait out my life anymore,
if no one else cares why should i?

having said my life is boring,
yesterday & last night was amaaaaaazing ♥
thank you chloe kingscote!

oooffff, i doubt anyone will read this,
but have some lyrics anyways.

everybody's changing - keane
"so little time, try to understand that i'm trying to make a move just to stay in the game, i try to stay awake and remember my name but everybody's changing and I don't feel the same..."

in the worlds of noel fielding-
"i have a face, you have a face, everything's gonna be alright."

♥♥♥

sixty-four: he looked out and said to me "run for your life!"

fine, i admit it...
i love doctor who.
it's amazing.
♥ ♥ ♥
even though david tennant's left.
*sob sob* )':
david tennant was actually the best.
the actual meaning of
"The Doctor"
was found in david tennant.




^ ^ ^
chameleon circuit ♥ ♥ ♥
a band whose genre is "time lord rock".
om nom nom nom :3
not only that, but a band with charlie mcdonnell & alex day.
i've actually fallen in love.
aahhhhhhhhhh!
that song's not even their best,
search "blink chameleon circuit" on youtube.
about episode 139, with the weeping angels.
best.
episode.
ever.

matt smith is good, however.
not david tennant, i admit,
but my god,
the man is fit.
and he had a good first epidode :3

my god, i'm such a nerd.

lyrics! xD

an awful lot of running - chameleon circuit
"it's completely terrifying but it's so so exciting,
he said i was brilliant and i could change the world,
so many places i've been; there's so much more to see,
we've got galaxies and planets and moons
and an awful lot of running to do..."

eubanks out, (Y)
♥

sixty-three.

merrrrrrr.
i'm on my ipod & i'm useless at typing on this thing /;
so i guess i'm gonna have to make this a short one.

formspring is reeeeeeaallyyy getting me down.
everyone else has
"you're so pretty!"
"i love you but i don't wanna say anything 'cause you'll laugh at me :$"
"you have beautiful eyes..."
and i get
"slag"
"go hang yourself"
"you deserve to die"
and a ton of random racist abuse.
gee, thanks.
that's really gonna make me feel nice |:
i still don't know who these people are,
or why they hate me so much,
but there must be something about me that just makes me hateable.
can someone tell me what it is?
...
please?

so next time any of you davenant lot ask me what's wrong,
just go and read my formspring.
and there is your reason.

gaaahhh, i'm actually shaking now /;
FML.
forget this.
i need a hug.