seventy: merrr.

oh, people are back on blogger.
now, i leave.

sixty-nine: fuck this.

i'm sick of my parents being divorced.
it's never really got to me before.
and now it has.
fbdnkaml~lxsaxlpws.

i'm sick of being so lonely.
everyone is in a couple now,
always being the 3rd/5th/7th wheel is getting tiring.

this is shit.
just you talking to her makes me want to cry.
facebook wall posts, and now i know you're texting her.
i'm invisible.
i honestly think i'm invisible.

no one invites me anywhere.
ever.
i haven't been out anywhere without family in so long.
makes me think i'm not even fucking wanted, tbh.
daddy, i know you won't take the job in san francisco,
but if you do, i'm coming with you.
no one would miss me if i left.
i know it.
i'm always on my own, no one includes me,
people barely talk to me.
my guild play group only wanted me because i like poetry.
i can't even blag a couple of days off school because this week is too important.
i'm trying.
i really am.
nobody else is.

i'm so, so glad no one reads these...

sixty-eight.

you don't care.
you'll never care.

sixty-seven: long time no speak, blogger.

in one sense, i'm so happy no one comes on here anymore.
blogger is back the way i like it,
unpopular and deserted.
so i can rant.
rant rant rant rant rant :D
so, yeah...

there's something i think i need to announce to... someone/something/anything.
i discovered it recently.
and i don't like it much,
and you haven't realised, i don't think.
but it's one of those things that eats you up inside.
pretty blatantly, it's about you.
you're stupid, you're annoying,
you continue to hurt me, physically and mentally,
and you have no idea.
but i think the thing that pisses me off the most would be the way you can make me smile without even trying,
the way you start every conversation with "hello wanker!"
the way i can be my complete and total self around you,
the way you make me open up to you,
the way you pull out all the stops to make me feel better,
the way you say things that make me feel like the only person in the world that matters,
the way you don't try to be anything you're not.

you make me smile, you make me laugh, you make me happy.
and...
i love you.
there.
i said it.
merrrrrrrrrrrrr.
fml.

thank you, and goodnight, motherfxckersss. ♥